Sometimes when one is trying to make an impression one may leave out the idea that maybe, just maybe someone out there is just looking for the real you. Not some selective wording that makes one look like an all around “hot shot”. Just a plain, bare bones look at who you are. The onion at its very center; no more layers to pull back and tear up over(obviously because you’re frustrated and tired of reading the…”I like photography because I know how to hold a camera! Yay! So Pick me!”)
Or at least I can hope there are people out there looking for a general idea of personality based off real personality and not some artsy smartsy paragraph that explains how I went to art school and got a BFA in Photography and I have a Canon and a lens that costs more than my life.
So really here’s me. In a nut shell. “Help I’m in a nutshell!”(austin powers?)
I love the energy that runs through me at the first thoughts of a photo shoot of any kind. I get like a little kid that either has to pee and is doing the pee dance or in a candy store and everything looks delicious and is cheaper than a dollar! Gimme gimme! It’s the best rush. Any photo shoot is new and exciting. Nothing gets old with photography. There’s always a different place, face, and idea. Even if it’s been done before, as my college professor once told me, “it wasn’t done by you or with whom you are using as a subject. At that moment you are original.” Thanks man. I will remember that forever because it is a key to me of selling an idea that I just love and want to use repeatedly until it dies. Always a new person to try it with and possibly new location, but somehow still fresh even if I did it about 2 weeks ago.
My mind thinks of 8359284023898943024 things at one time. But some how I can focus on one thing and listen to another and still figure out what’s going on around me. I’m as random as they come because of this. I also think that sometimes I come off as the dumb blonde I may look like, but I’m really coherent and I think I have intelligence. Outside perspectives are nice, but please be kind, even if I lack intelligence, I am positive I still have feelings.
I’m stubborn. Like a mule. Once that rope slips over my head forget it. Those hooves are grounded so deep not even a tractor trailer could pull me UNLESS real facts proved otherwise and I might actually be tempted to move in some direction small or large. I want to do the opposite of what is expected. Most of the time for the benefit of myself because it doesn’t directly effect anyone else and I’d rather not bother someone if that’s possibly.
See I am also overly considerate and thoughtful of human beings. I never want to pressure or put myself in anyone’s way. I’m laid back so far that my chair might tip over and if by chance I tipped, that’s cool, at least it was highlarious.
I’m weird. I once read that Lady Gaga prayed every night when she was younger for insanity. Now you may love or hate her with every ounce of your being, but I found it interesting that she “prayed for insanity”. Now look at her. Despite being hated(or loved) she is successful and she’s exactly what she wanted to be, insane. She may be a walking contradiction in some cases, but she appears….insane. Now I never prayed for insanity, but I wouldn’t mind letting my crazy artistic side really run rampant if I didn’t think I’d go more insane. I hold back. Another thing to know about me. I don’t want to, but I do. Sometimes I suffer diarrhea of the mouth and really say my idea aloud and it proves me wrong and works, but other times I fall short and keep to myself. Needs work, but I got time. Hopefully. hah…
I am a dance machine. Literally. If I could dance all the time I would. Music moves me. Even if it’s just a tapping foot. I can’t stay still when I hear a beat I like. I shake, rattle, and roll like it’s my job sometimes and I wish that I got out to clubs more with my friends. I am so happy when I dance. By the end of the night the endorphin high I’m experiencing is like no runner’s high you’ve ever felt.
I dream of being a successful photographer plus 50 other things. I can’t settle on one permanent goal. I want many. I need many. Goal me up. I dream dream dream and wish wish wish to succeed in as much as possible because I love variety. I love to switch and change.
I’m writing this blog because I feel like I need to reach out some how and express myself. That some how that will get me where I hope to go. That someone might actually read my blog and this entry and go “This girl’s nuts, but I like her style!” I may have been picked last for sports in school, but I don’t want to be picked last when it comes to photography. I always find myself saying to…myself….tbat if given the challenge and the freedom I would impress so many and do such great things. I just need someone to open the door and ask me to come in. Or is that the wrong approach? I dunno. With a great challenge comes a greater need for me to impress and push forward. Saddle up girl you’re in for a ride and this horse ain’t buckin like a rabbit, it’s brunco time! (see, weird, random, you like?)
I’m short and I’m real. There is no chocolate coating. I’m as raw as an almond as they come. I want to prove it.
Until evidence is necessary, my camera and I are going to go snuggle in bed and sleep.